the red balloon

I'd like to think I only remember the most important things from my past, but the truth is I remember so little, so there's no way to telling whether my memories are significant or just the ones that happened to stick around.

Although I don't remember kindergarten or 1st grade much, preschool is something I'll never forget.

It was in preschool that I met two of the most amazing friends I'll ever have

(and they are still my dearest today).

It was in preschool where I was first sent to the "principles office"

(the first of a shocking number of times, all of which deserve their own post).

It was in preschool that I decided I liked art because I could draw the best circle

or so everyone said.

It was in preschool that I first saw The Red Balloon,

a movie that affected me in unexplainable yet profound ways.

And it was in preschool where I realized that although very young and very timid,

I was capable of doing very big things and feeling very big emotions.

My life felt bigger than me.

It still does.

I first saw the movie The Red Balloon in preschool and later received it on VHS for christmas when I was maybe 12. I was so tickled yesterday to find it for instant play on netflix. It's less than 40 min. long, and there's barely any talking (it's in french). I don't know why it stirred those emotions in me so long ago but as I watched it last night, the tears came and I felt some crazy sort of love for it and for life. And although it probably won't make sense, The Red Balloon captures that bit of me I'm unable to explain. Perhaps it has something to do with the way I view the world. That life, ideas, love, pain, everything we feel is deeper, bigger, more than just us. With all the turmoil that is going on right now throughout the world I am happy to be reminded, in a humble way, of how small I am, but how big life is.

My thoughts and prayers go out to those hurt by last weeks events, and although I feel somewhat helpless in aiding, I am thankful to be able to feel such a deep love for my brothers and sisters on the other side of the globe. And I'm more determined than ever to take advantage of this wonderful opportunity of LIFE i've been given.