"Ole!' to you, just for having the sheer human love and stubbornness to keep showing up."
-Elizabeth Gilbert
I had a conversation with myself the other day during a very painful "trying to make art" moment. It went something like this:
"Self,
why did you choose to be an artist? you could have chosen math, where there are right and wrong answers. Or science, where there is fact. Or social work, where your contribution to the world is plain to see. But you chose art. and in doing so you chose personal anguish. You chose to question and doubt every move you make. You chose a path that has very little black and whites and instead, a thousand shades of grey. But you chose it. Why?"
why did you choose to be an artist? you could have chosen math, where there are right and wrong answers. Or science, where there is fact. Or social work, where your contribution to the world is plain to see. But you chose art. and in doing so you chose personal anguish. You chose to question and doubt every move you make. You chose a path that has very little black and whites and instead, a thousand shades of grey. But you chose it. Why?"
"I chose it. true. But it sort of chose me. Remember? I wanted to say something but black wasn't right. it was too black. and white was...well, just too white. And I needed another language and I found grey. lots of grey. I am trying to speak a language that I don't understand. It's like i've got the right words but really poor grammar. or good ideas but bad diction."
just keep showing up.
-self
*are you a TED talks fan? You will be.....I highly recommend this talk.
Whenever I'm feeling stuck, I listen to that talk. It's so good.
ReplyDeleteEverything is more beautiful against grey. You chose art (it chose you) because you really do speak the language so well. Fluency in anything takes a lifetime.
ReplyDeleteThat and J.K. Rowling's "The Fringe Benefits of Failure" are my very favorite ted talks.
ReplyDelete