I haven't experienced much missing in my life. I've always had my family and friends so close by that I could call them in the middle of the night to aid me in who knows what, or to talk, or to just be with me. I haven't had to say very many goodbyes, not real ones at least. Goodbye has always been a short term/temporary statement. More like a "see you soon" sort of thing. Perhaps having a willing family so close makes my life a bit charmed. But I think it also makes me fragile. There is something about "gone" that I don't comprehend. And it probably all seems silly and a bit dramatic but I think about "gone" a lot. My big brother and his wife moved to NYC a few months ago. And I miss them terribly. But even more, I feel like I missed out while they were here. Brandon and I caught our camping bug a little too late, we never took that hike we kept talking about, and there were so many conversations that could have been had, had we (I) made the effort. I realize they aren't really gone, just somewhere else.
I don't want to miss out on the good that is right in front of me. I want to be able to say goodbye to people and things in my life, knowing I did everything I could to love and learn from them. I want to feel ready to say goodbye, so that I'm not left missing.
Dane & Brit- we are working hard and saving lots in hopes to see you soon! And when we do, we'll take that hike and talk all those talks we should have had a few months back.
*photos taken in film last november. missing, but found.