one year has gone by

a lot of it was bliss.

a lot of it was tough.

all of it was love.

and a bunch is just a blur.

kinda like these photos.

i'm so grateful I have this little blog to document B's and my relationship lest I forget all the details that tell our story. Because, after all, it's the details that make the story worth while.

from the moment i knew I loved him to the very day I told him so. so much of it is here. some hidden, little memos to remind just me, like little secrets. Much of it blatant, to share.

for that I am grateful.

x-claire

P to the S: the giveaway I keep spreading rumors about is certainly true. it is coming. i promise. but after a weekend of pure vacation laziness, I'm having a hard time dealing with harsh reality (aka school work school work laundry). you understand right?

that brandon....

I had blogging plans to finish up my wedding review (finally), have a giveaway {that I'm SOOO excited for}, and spend the weekend reading my american heritage textbook.

but it looks like I'll be away

with my sweet husband

celebrating our 1st anniversary!

see you next week :)

xoxox

claire

the men in my life

I'm so lucky to have amazing men in my life. Happy fathers day to my 4 favorites:

Poppy: dearest dad, thanks for raising me to love nature and to love God. thanks for teaching me to be productive, work hard, make goals and accomplish them. thank you for being proud of my life, for pushing me and supporting me. I knew I had to marry someone as good as you, I just couldn't settle.

Daddy Gene: boy did I get lucky with In-laws! I love you and your constant example to me. You have such amazing faith in God. You have made me feel so important in your life and family. You raised one heck of a boy and I'll forever be grateful for that. He is soo good to me and I know its because he spent 23 years watching his dad.

Dane {brother}: I've always wanted to be "just like you". you are so brave with life, you set your mind to the seemingly impossible and you accomplish it. Thank you for being everything that a big brother should be. You'll make one heck of a dad someday to your dozens of adopted Korean babies :) I miss you and Brit already.

Brandon: I love you more than I ever knew I could love a person. You are my life. I know the thought of our own babies kinda scares the poo out of us but someday, when the time comes, I know you'll be the most amazing father. You'll raise our kids to dream big and to love all the little things in life. You'll support them and love the guts out of them because thats what you do for me. I knew early on (embarrassingly early on) that I loved you, that I wanted you to raise a family with, that I wanted you forever.

the greatest thing about the men in my life is that although they are "mine" their love extends far beyond family. they are father-like figures and examples to everyone they come across. They would all lay down their life for me just as easily as they would for a neighbor or a complete stranger. They are just plain good people and I'm so blessed to get to share them with the world.

Rosie the Riveter

you should have heard B's and my conversation before this shoot.

"what if someone sees me?"

"it's not vain if its for fashion right?"

"I can't believe I'm doing this."

okay so it wasn't a conversation. I said all that stuff and Brandon rolled his eyes as he took my camera, prepping to document my wardrobe. I never thought I'd be one of those bloggers: the fashionable, if you will. There is nothing wrong with them, I just didn't think I would be one. BUT Truth is I like clothes. Truth is, I like creating outfits. Truth is, fashion is and always has been a part of me {not high fashion and big names, but wardrobing.in.general}. I like clothes. They are yet another means of expression. It's like wearing art.

I have a closet full of sewing projects, thrifty finds, mendings and up-cycles that have been tempting me to make this move. This move being: wardrobe posts. I'm going to test drive it out for a while and see how it feels. Your input is very much appreciated. {as always}

*this outfit happened miraculously this morning when I woke up late for work and had to be out the door in 15 minutes earlier. Jeans for comfort, loose blouse {as to not show my tacos from running around frantically), flats for the next 5 hours of being on my feet, hair scarf because my bangs were greasy and I didn't have time to shower.

The outfit of a working girl.

jeans: BR, blouse: GAP, shoes & scarf Jcrew {via DownEast Outfitters}

happy weekend!

xoxo

claire

p.s. give-away coming atcha next week!

p.p.s. 1 week till our 1 year anniversary!!

{I have a feeling next week is going to be just plain wonderful!}

bright pink chevron & the queen

"of royalty and such"

dry point and aqua-tint print

intaglio final spring 2011

the idea behind printing is consistency in multiples. I hate that. I like the little differences that come up in printing, i like each work to have it's own personalty. I don't like following the rules. I like breaking out the magenta ink after a run of 25 prints, where each one the queen {elizabeth} slowly starts fading away to nothing. i like progression to be evident. I don't like getting a poor grade for breaking the rules. But I like walking away with something I appreciate. Something just for me: like bright pink chevron.

{finals are over!}

Dear Husband,

thank you for putting up with stressy me this past semester (or 3 or 4). thank you for encouraging my art. for loving my art. for praising my art when I need it and critiquing it when I need that too. thank you for inspiring it. thank you for pep talking me when I'm about to give up. Thank you for assisting me at photoshoots and for helping me print in the print shop. thank you for running to the store to buy me ice-cream during all nighters and burritos after long days. just plain thanks.

i love you more than kooshballs, smores, the perfect shade of lipstick, and our red door marked #2 .

you are one heck of a babe.

and i love you.

xox

wife.

what I've been up to:

It's a myth that those who do art can draw. I was good at drawing once: in the first grade. My teacher would sit at the piano and play and my fellow pupils and I would draw "what the music makes you feel". No matter what music was playing I'd draw a landscape: three mountains in the background, two smallish hills in front, a tree to the right side with a path curving up and through the middle, and always ALWAYS grass blowing in the wind. The music always made me think of wind. I even got so good others would hire me to draw grass for them. (Lala, Kait, remember that?). Then I went through a stage of drawing irises (the flower), cartoon pigs, and bubble letters. Then I stopped drawing. stopped cause I realized I'm not all that good. Naturally I'm my worst critic and all but the truth of it is: relative to artists, drawing aint my thing. So you can imagine my hesitation for signing up for a figure drawing class....but I wanted the challenge. I wanted to be able to look at a person and portray them more accurately than my signature stick figure. And {i hope this doesn't come off braggy} I'm really proud of my improvement! wanna see?

*I've cleverly titled them for your enjoyment.

photo of a drawing of a blue girl by a silly girl with long toes.

old girl body with a little girl head

I hope this bum doesn't offend anyone. {FYI we don't have nude models at BYU, speedos and bikinis is how we roll thank you very much.} I promise you won't see any other bums on this blog or in my art, this particular work was to copy a masters work.

girl with outstanding body strength who can balance on one foot and look like she is sitting in an invisible chair.

okay but in all seriousness, my favorite exercise was doing blind contour drawings. I loved them so much in fact I filled an entire sketch book full of them (I'll share these later)! For those of you who don't know what blind contour means it's the act of drawing something without looking down at your paper AT ALL. I took the blind part very seriously and even taped a paper towel under my eyes so I couldn't cheat and see out of my peripheral. tricky yes, but the results are soo fun especially when coupled with all nighters.

(you might want to click to enlarge them to their full glory)

My teacher called me "the blind contour master" so I'm changing my future plans to become a full time blind contour portraiture artist (cause there is totally an industry out there for that profession). I charge $1 for commissions

hehe

2 finals down, 1 to go!!

cantaloupe smiles

I love mornings when neither husband nor I have something pressing to rush off to.

mornings where we share a cantaloupe in bed and browse netflix for a new documentary.

yes, I live for these mornings, even if the slowness only lasts a moment.

In a few hours life will get really fast.

I will have work, photo shoots, and then the dreaded finals to prepare for.

Finals usually turn me into an ugly person. So I will be taking a short blogging break until life gives me another slow moment. my computer needs a break too. he's on the brink of his life I fear. which means he's contemplating ruining mine. yuck.

wishing you a happy weekend!

xo

claire

p.s. B didn't even do his hair this morning. what the heck.

I think I found the answer to my creativity drought

thanks for the advice, gary

home

the following was a final project for my 2D class a few semesters back. I originally had this huge super long and boring artist statement that explains the work in depth, but it might have been the wordiest post ever so I decided to not include it. Instead I've condensed it to a blog friendly size. It may be a little vague (I'm not good with using little words to describe things), but hopefully you'll get it. If you'd like to, go ahead and skip all the wordy stuff and scroll down to the good stuff! I promise I won't judge you one bit (nor will I know).

I don't consider my life to be picture perfect, though it is easy to portray ones life in that way when it is confined to just that: a photo. Rather than contrive a life I'd like to have, I'm learning to let go of that need for control and accept things as they are. I'm learning that life is a process of imperfections. a lesson of little control. an experiment of trial and error and a whole lot of trust. this work embodies a therapy of sorts for me. a challenge to embrace the unorganized chaos and reality that make up my life.

also! a super huge thanks to Trish for helping me crop sizes and for motivation!! you are awesome!!!

she really is all sorts of amazing: check out her awesomeness here!)

facts and confessions

I gave up the gym pass,

sidewalks are free.

I have a love hate relationship with running.

I reward myself with mountain west burritos and cute workout clothes.

I swear they make me run faster.

I'm not very good at stained glass

it's ok. {my mom still helps me with my homework.}

I'm going to school.

and it's summer time.

and it kinda hurts my heart a little.

I'm learning about guitars.

next to B, a Gibson Les Paul Goldtop might be the sexiest thing on earth.

brandon wants a new guitar

but he wants one that looks like it should be on The Wiggles.

one time I accidently watched The Wiggles on tv.

I thought it was just a few minutes but it was a whole episode. maybe two.

it was scary.

I miss Mr. Rogers, Reading Rainbow, and Cookie Monster.

{poor kids being tricked into thinking vegetables are fun}

I'm the worst speller. don't believe me?

brandon had to help me spell vegetables.

he just asked me what I would do without him.

good question.

k-12 my mom made me a sack lunch.

she makes a mean PB&J.

things like this make me smile.

there should be an SNL best of Kristen Wiig.

I want to be her when I grow up.

I did a shoot for Bajio.

{I should say "we" since B did 1/2 or more of the work. Who knew he was so good with cameras?}

you better believe we stuffed our faces afterwards.

I LOVED all your music recommendations!

they might all be new favorites.

I never learned the states in elementary school.

don't worry, I have a placemat that quizzes me breakfast lunch and dinner.

I have a nomadic soul.

and it's feeling rather confined as of late.

winning this unbelievable giveaway might just fix that.

a to do list, more or less

more doing

less sitting

more saving

less spending

more reading

less watching

more organic

less processed

more sleep

less worry

more meals

less snacks

more protein

less sweets

more love

less hurry

more trying

less hesitation

more letters

less texts

more faces

less facebook

more nature

less urban

more participating

less observing

thanks to Judy Bloom, I've been trying to shake the habit of starting my prayers out

"Are you there God? It's me, Claire" since my pre-teens.

I know he's there, boy do I know he's there. I guess I use it as a warning of sorts

I'd like to think in most relationships I'm a pretty decent listener. But in prayer: I'm a conversation hog. It's one thought, thing {complaint} after another and usually {hopefully} I'll recognize my fault, slow down, and listen. But sometime, like tonight, the tears were just too strong and I needed the outlet. So God waited, because he is the epitome of patience, and when I'd said every last possibly thing my tired mind could think of, he spoke.

he said I was being silly.

and he was right.

He reminded me that when my life was slow I was bored. That I crave productivity so why was I complaining. He pointed out that the 4 hours of weeding my garden was 4 hours spent with my husband. That the hard work would pay off. He reminded me how much I love my job, that photography is an outlet, a moment of control, and an ability I'll forever be grateful for. That my busy day tomorrow that I've been dreading is just one blessing after another: money earned from hard work, classes to teach me to better do what I love, time spent with family celebrating a graduation. He reminded me how lucky I am.

And I'd be silly to forget it.

and then it was my turn again.

and all I could think to say was thank You.

thank You

thank You

thank You